Gesso, ink, pigment powder 
900 x 750 cm 

bloat 
Verb 
to become swollen with fluid or gas 

That feeling of being on the verge of bursting. My stomach aches, stretched by grief in all its flavors. I try to decompress by chasing ideas: some new, some only half-formed, some already lost. Lately, the art I make feels ugly, as if I’ve hurled every shade of emotion onto the canvas, unsure if any of them belong. I’m frantic; unthreading the seams of what was and what is, just to relieve the pressure. 

Drawing has always been a kind of home, a place without a map, an outcome unknown. Each mark simmers in me before it rises, like heat trapped deep in the gut, waiting to boil over, waiting to become. 

This work is made in collaboration with vibrators suspended from the ceiling. As I move the canvas against these vibrating instruments, unexpected textures and marks emerge gestures I could never control, only invite. 

Image: Brenton McGeachie